Introduction 

    The Lord is doing exciting things in your life right now. As a single adult, you have the greatest opportunity to serve the Lord, your community, your country, and to make a profound difference in the world for Jesus Christ. Marriage is incredible, and I highly recommend it; but being single, saved and satisfied in the Lord is the most powerful time in a believer’s life.

    My prayer is that you will see my heart and the heart of God throughout this book. I care about the current and future state of unmarried Christians, and the Lord has placed a burden in me to communicate His love and His Word to this particular group of people.

    Like so many young people, I was raised on television and movies, without the Word of God or strong godly influences in my life. I did not have a church life growing up, but as a nightclub junkie in my twenties when I traveled around the country working a publishing sales job, I used to return to my hotel room late at night in Chicago, Los Angeles, Las Vegas or Atlanta, turn the television on and watch Dr. Fred Price’s ministry before falling asleep. (Thank you, Dr. Price for appearing on late night secular television.)

    I grew up with five of my six siblings, raised by our courageous mother, on the streets of the South Bronx, New York, in the mid sixties into the seventies. At the age of eleven I was a rapper (the original MC Hutch), before rap records were ever made—yes, even before “Rapper’s Delight.” Moving to Virginia at the age of 15, I finished high school and returned to New York City where I attended the American Academy of Dramatic Arts. After years of ups and downs in the entertainment industry and success in sales and marketing (I was also a bartender, limo driver, receptionist, and party organizer), a failed marriage, and more headaches and heartache than I care to recall, I finally heard the voice of the Lord calling me. A womanizer, adulterer, drug addict, and alcoholic, I was due for a radical change in my life. I was living in Los Angeles, sold out to the entertainment industry, and found myself in a seemingly bottomless pit, when the earthquake of 1994 (the Northridge earthquake) hit. Like many people in the Los Angeles area, I was rocked. I refused to live another day without knowing who was in charge of this thing called life. About a month later, I humbled myself and visited a friend’s church. On that fateful day I came to know Jesus Christ as both Lord and Savior of my life.

    Since surrendering all to Jesus, my life has been a faith-filled journey. If I could return in time and do it all over, I wouldn’t. Many of the things that I have suffered through were not about me, but perhaps about you­. If my struggle can make your walk easier, it was truly worth it all.

    Lists and rules or my frequent suggestions may turn some of you off.  I don’t blame you, but had I had access to this information during my single Christian days, I would have done better, sooner. My candor may seem offensive at times; I do not mean to offend, but I’m just a straightforward person. I make no apologies for the man I used to be (unless I did you wrong, and for that I am sorry).

Single Christians should focus on growing in the saving knowledge of Jesus Christ; becoming active contributors to the advancement of the Kingdom of God; caring for the things of the Lord and pleasing Him; and maturing spiritually and naturally into      well-balanced, mature Christians, free of past hurts, and positioned to be a blessing to themselves—and others. This may come across as a bold and challenging statement to some and a refreshing perspective to others. Either way, this book was inspired by the Lord to help you and people within your sphere of influence to look at unmarried or single Christian life as a blessing, not a curse, and to uncover the need for Extreme Preparation For Dating.

    In order to prepare for Christian dating, one must first become a Christian. See the end of this book to learn how to place your faith in Jesus Christ. The most important question that every unmarried Christian must ask is, what kind of Christian do I desire to be—spiritual or carnal (of the flesh)? The answer to this question will determine how and if you will utilize the principles and precepts in this book.

    Whether or not your future plans include marriage or not, my dream is that you use this book as a resource, a handbook, or a guide to help you live a successful single life in Jesus Christ and to prepare yourself for whatever lies ahead.